I Can't Homeschool My Kids
As I’ve embarked on this homeschooling journey 9 years ago I’ve heard countless times people say to me, “Good for you on homeschooling your children. I could never homeschool my children” or “My children learn best from somebody else”, “ or “I don’t know how you do it”.
Whenever we embark on a path untraveled it can seem insurmountable at first. The negative voices in our head or from those around us can drown out any hope of starting. But it doesn’t have to be that way!
In this post I want to tackle some common reasons people give for not beginning a homeschooling journey and my response to them.
There is not enough time in the day
If we look at the model of school in the public and private school and think we have to imitate that model then the idea of homeschooling can sure look daunting. Many think that if their child is in school for 6-7 hours a day that equates to 6-7 hours a day of homeschooling. Thankfully that is simply not true. Teaching your children at home can be so much more efficient than what you have seen in schools.
In elementary school you can expect about 1 - 3 hours of school, at upper elementary a large amount of that is independent work.
In middle school you can expect 2-4 hours, mostly independent with guidance.
In high school you can expect 5-6 hours, mostly independent with guidance.
My children need other children so they can be properly socialized
I’ve heard this from some very sincere people. They are greatly concerned. To be honest I wondered myself as I began homeschooling. If you are going to hole up inside your home and never go out with others then you might have a legit concern. For most children who are homeschooled this is simply not an issue. There are SO many opportunities to socialize with others. One benefit I’ve noticed from homeschooling is my children can engage people on all age levels. They’ve come to consider all people of all age levels as possible friends.
My oldest looks up to an older gentleman who is worth imitating. He encourages my son in the Lord Jesus and my son sees him as a true friend. So sweet to witness!
My children learn best from somebody else
People are created to be in a relationship with others. We need each other. That is true with family members as well. Parents, seek to have your children’s ear. Pray and ask God if there are any obstacles in your relationship with your children that are hindering them listening to you.
One of the biggest obstacles to building a solid relationship with our children is anger. It can be yelling, cold shoulders, holding grudges, sharp answers, stiff body language or angry looks.
Be vulnerable with your children. Sit down with them and ask them if they feel like you are angry with them. Ask them how it makes them feel. Tell them you are trying to change it.
I’m not judging you. I’m sharing what I have learned from my own life. I too have anger issues. They aren’t the yelling type but the sharp answer and angry face type. Doesn’t matter though as they are all just as damaging. I’m on a path of refinement with the help of God and I’m striving to be better and do better. Just writing this is making me think I need to talk to my children again and see if we are good in this department.
When we are in a good relationship with our children they can learn from us. We just need to be patient and humble and teachable. We need to recognize our limitations and seek outside help when necessary. I’m here to tell you today that your children can learn from you!
I don’t have enough patience
I’ve heard from others that I’m a patient person but I keep telling them “That’s only because you don’t see what is going on on the inside of me”. It’s true. By the grace of God over the years I’ve been able to learn how to put a pause between my frustration and what I say or show. Pause. Breath. Pray for help to respond well. Respond.
Have you ever prayed for patience? It’s a dangerous prayer because the answer usually comes in tangible ways to practice that very skill. It is a process to learn patience. It takes practice. It takes prayer. It takes humbling yourself to ask for forgiveness. It takes effort to try again. Thankfully children are gracious to give abundant forgiveness when we blow it!
I’m not that organized
Neither was I was when I started. Homeschooling has a way of refining me as well. I look back at my old self and can't believe how unorganized and messy I was. One step at a time. I’ve learned tips and tricks along the way and you can too.
I’d feel too overwhelmed
Start simple. Just start with the basics. You can always add on as you get the flow of schooling at home. I’ve heard it said that if you condensed all there is to know in school from K - 12th grade your child can learn all there is to learn in 4 years! That is an encouraging thought!
I’m not smart enough to teach them everything they need to know
Secret...neither are most teachers when they start. Most people who have completed high school have lost the majority of the information they once knew. If you love your children and you want the best for them, if you are teachable yourself and willing to learn alongside them or get them outside help when they need it then you are qualified! Don’t let the educational elitist out there tell you otherwise. I use to be one of them.